The Bloody Doors Off

When I was a kid, I got horrible migraines. Debilitating, lock myself in a darkened room with a cold cloth on my forehead and eyes, completely soundless. I would scream in pain. Aspirin couldn’t touch it. Sometimes the only relief was throwing up. I have a memory of medical testing with needles stuck in my cranium.

In my late teens/early 20s I got hit with them again. Twice I ended up in hospital. Hooked up to IV with pain medication. Once I was stuck in the waiting room so long I had to run into the bathroom and be violently ill. By the time they called me in, the migraine had dissipated.

I had a couple towards the end of the 2000s, when I was living on Gowan. These were triggered usually in winter and I’d contracted bronchitis, and the horrid coughing would trigger what I would call ‘flash’ migraines.

And then. Nothing.

I barely even got headaches. If I felt one approaching, a couple of Tylenol would do the trick.

Flash forward to today.

I woke up an hour before my alarm, with a headache that was worsening by the minute. I’d sat up over the side of the bed, but didn’t go to retrieve a painkiller. Boy, was that a mistake.

Within 30 minutes the migraine had moved into the rear of my brain, playing Won’t Be Fooled Again, and not by any random drummer. This was the Keith Moon of migraines. I grabbed the bucket we reserved for situations such as this (where we were disposed — i.e., sitting on the toilet — and the option to puke was revoked) and spent several minutes retching. And I had nothing to give. A tiny bit of water, that was it. Have you ever experienced this? It’s brutal on the throat. And with a migraine?

Shoot me now.

I was also battling low blood sugar. I woke my wife and asked for her help. I needed orange juice and a cold cloth. I pressed the cloth against the base of my neck and took a few sips. It almost immediately came back up. (But so did my sugars, so, win?)

I went back to bed and slept. I’d already gotten five hours before this. And now I would be unconscious for another six hours.

Until I woke up with… a second migraine.

This has never happened.

Ever.

So. Rinse and repeat. Only this time the pain eased and I felt well enough to remain awake. And after about an hour I felt well enough (and a little hungry) so I made myself a pb&j sandwich.

It came back up before I even finished it.

Back to bed, I went.

I slept another 4 hours, well into the evening. But now I feel like myself, and I am enjoying my first cup of coffee and watching Hot Fuzz on Hollywood Suite (which is on free preview this month).

How was your day?