The Bloody Doors Off

Tomorrow I go in for a preliminary assessment prior to booking a new sleep study.

I don’t know if my problems sleeping are a direct result of my downswing, or vice versa. I only know I’ve got to explore every option towards getting back to myself.

I’m tired of feeling like shit. Tired of doubting myself. It’s affecting my work, my relationships with friends and family.

It’s been 11 months. That’s weighing on me as well. Stupid to worry about this particular anniversary. I just want to push past it and say “see? it was in the past and that’s where it’s going to stay.”

and yet.

and yet.

I should take my pills and get some sleep. Ha.