The Bloody Doors Off

I’m stuck.

I’ve got ideas for the play, but am having trouble getting it started properly. The first scene has been revised. But there’s new stuff I want to write for it and that will inform other scenes in the play, and so I don’t want to get too heavy into rewrites until the new pages are done. But that’s the catch-22: getting a proper handle on the new stuff. I know what I want to accomplish, just not sure how to start it off.

And that makes me feel… empty. Like the well’s run dry, waiting to be filled up.

Went out to get a few groceries earlier, and it was really nice out. Sunshine, above zero temperature. But it just didn’t call to me. Finally a day that isn’t making me feel like hibernating, and I didn’t take advantage of it. And now it’s evening, and I want to write, but it’s not calling to me either.

And then there are the coincidences. Finding a song earlier today from Vangelis called ‘Rachel’s Song’. Blade Runner on the television (character? Rachel). It’s that kind of day. Everything’s telling me to write. But I’m blank.

Even worse? I was supposed to go out tonight with friends. I was dressed and ready. And wham, anxiety flooded. For no good reason. It just did. And before I was aware, I was in my pajamas and under a blanket on the couch.

Ugh.